Thursday, October 9, 2008
Tuesday, June 17, 2008
I have become Mulan
I couldn't do things the traditional way... now I have to do things the new way. It was going to be like this eventually.
I will miss everyone who matters to me.
But I'm not gone forever.
This is the official end of my childhood. I'm a new person now. A new chapter in my book. I know that some time in the future I'll look back and this. I'll remember exactly how it felt. And I will never forget. I will never forget my nâm, farhangam, va tamâme sutunhâ ke vujudam râ jâvid mikonan.
نام جاوید وطن
صبح امید وطن
جلوه کن در آسمان
همچو مهر جاودان
وطن ای هستی من
شور و سرمستی من
چهر آن در آسمان
همچو مهر جاودان
بشنو سوز سخنم
که هم آواز تو منم
همه ی جان و تنم
وطنم وطنم وطنم وطنم
بشنو سوز سخنم
که نواگر این چمنم
همه ی جان و تنم
وطنم وطنم وطنم وطنم
همه با یک نام و نشان
به تفاوت هر رنگ و زبان
همه با یک نام و نشان
به تفاوت هر رنگ و زبان
همه شاد و خوش و نغمه زنان
ز صلابت ایران جوان
ز صلابت ایران جوان
ز صلابت ایران جوان
I will miss everyone who matters to me.
But I'm not gone forever.
This is the official end of my childhood. I'm a new person now. A new chapter in my book. I know that some time in the future I'll look back and this. I'll remember exactly how it felt. And I will never forget. I will never forget my nâm, farhangam, va tamâme sutunhâ ke vujudam râ jâvid mikonan.
نام جاوید وطن
صبح امید وطن
جلوه کن در آسمان
همچو مهر جاودان
وطن ای هستی من
شور و سرمستی من
چهر آن در آسمان
همچو مهر جاودان
بشنو سوز سخنم
که هم آواز تو منم
همه ی جان و تنم
وطنم وطنم وطنم وطنم
بشنو سوز سخنم
که نواگر این چمنم
همه ی جان و تنم
وطنم وطنم وطنم وطنم
همه با یک نام و نشان
به تفاوت هر رنگ و زبان
همه با یک نام و نشان
به تفاوت هر رنگ و زبان
همه شاد و خوش و نغمه زنان
ز صلابت ایران جوان
ز صلابت ایران جوان
ز صلابت ایران جوان
Monday, June 16, 2008
Friday, June 13, 2008
قرارمون یادت نره
یادت نره دوست دارم
خیلی دلم تنگه برات
دار و ندارم رو بگیر
مال خودت ، مال چشات
خورشید و بردار و بیا
آفتابی شو به خاطرم
قرارمون یادت نره
دیر نكنی ، منتظرم
قرارمون یادت نره
دوستت دارم یادت نره
قرارمون یادت نره
دوست دارم یادت نره
قرارمون ساعت عشق
كنارِ دلشوره زدن
كنار دلواپسی و
ترس یه وقت نیومدن
عاشقم و عاشقِ تو
از همه دیوونه ترم
قرارمون یادت نره
دیر نكنی منتظرم
قرارمون یادت نره
دوستت دارم یادت نره
قرارمون كنارِ گل
كه سر به زیرِ عطر توست
تو چین چینِ دامنی كه
هزار تا بغض رو میشه شست
خورشید و بردار و بیار { بردار و بیار }
آفتابی شو به خاطرم { خاطرم }
قرارمون یادت نره
دیر نكنی منتظرم
یادت نره دوست دارم
خیلی دلم تنگه برات
دار و ندارم رو بگیر
مال خودت ، مال چشات
قرارمون یادت نره
دوست دارم یادت نره
قرارمون یادت نره
دوست دارم یادت نره
قرارمون یادت نره
دوست دارم یادت نره
خیلی دلم تنگه برات
دار و ندارم رو بگیر
مال خودت ، مال چشات
خورشید و بردار و بیا
آفتابی شو به خاطرم
قرارمون یادت نره
دیر نكنی ، منتظرم
قرارمون یادت نره
دوستت دارم یادت نره
قرارمون یادت نره
دوست دارم یادت نره
قرارمون ساعت عشق
كنارِ دلشوره زدن
كنار دلواپسی و
ترس یه وقت نیومدن
عاشقم و عاشقِ تو
از همه دیوونه ترم
قرارمون یادت نره
دیر نكنی منتظرم
قرارمون یادت نره
دوستت دارم یادت نره
قرارمون كنارِ گل
كه سر به زیرِ عطر توست
تو چین چینِ دامنی كه
هزار تا بغض رو میشه شست
خورشید و بردار و بیار { بردار و بیار }
آفتابی شو به خاطرم { خاطرم }
قرارمون یادت نره
دیر نكنی منتظرم
یادت نره دوست دارم
خیلی دلم تنگه برات
دار و ندارم رو بگیر
مال خودت ، مال چشات
قرارمون یادت نره
دوست دارم یادت نره
قرارمون یادت نره
دوست دارم یادت نره
قرارمون یادت نره
دوست دارم یادت نره
Sunday, June 8, 2008
Friday, May 30, 2008
Thursday, May 8, 2008
Solace in strange places
How would anyone understand?
"All the world's a stage,
And all the men and women merely players;
They have their exits and their entrances;
And one man in his time plays many parts,
His acts being seven ages. At first the infant,
Mewling and puking in the nurse's arms;
And then the whining school-boy, with his satchel
And shining morning face, creeping like snail
Unwillingly to school. And then the lover,
Sighing like furnace, with a woeful ballad
Made to his mistress' eyebrow. Then a soldier,
Full of strange oaths, and bearded like the pard,
Jealous in honour, sudden and quick in quarrel,
Seeking the bubble reputation
Even in the cannon's mouth. And then the justice,
In fair round belly with good capon lin'd,
With eyes severe and beard of formal cut,
Full of wise saws and modern instances;
And so he plays his part. The sixth age shifts
Into the lean and slipper'd pantaloon,
With spectacles on nose and pouch on side;
His youthful hose, well sav'd, a world too wide
For his shrunk shank; and his big manly voice,
Turning again toward childish treble, pipes
And whistles in his sound. Last scene of all,
That ends this strange eventful history,
Is second childishness and mere oblivion;
Sans teeth, sans eyes, sans taste, sans everything." — Jaques (Act II, Scene VII, lines 139-166)
What's particularly frightening is that it actually is possible for a person to be completely detached. I hate having to mold myself into archetypes. One of the most important things a person must do is accept the self. But it is always difficult when there is no actual predecessor of some sort to draw experience on. I suppose for some people, it is quite easy to be able to look at another person and empathize with just that person. There is, however, a difficulty when there is just too much empathy to go around. "Not fitting in" is in and of itself a form of fitting in. But it's a special kind. For starters, it is much more difficult to conciliate. I know this is fairly typical of people who feel like outcasts, but what's particularly frightening is what happens when even then it's not enough. Of course, every person's life is unique; but some are more unique than others. Downward spirals.
When I look back at what I have done, there is a very strange ambiance. I wish I was normal.
Normal.
But it's too late now. Will I find someone that will share my experiences? Is that even possible?
I've tried, but I don't find it likely. The idiosyncrasy is chilling. What I have noticed is that I can fit in, but it's always some sort of trade off. I can only tell some parts to some people. How that works is very much like a meat-grinder which has discrete settings which determine the size of the chunks.
I won't understand it; at least, not anytime soon. The specifics will fade away. Nothing will be left except for a dark aura of myth.
When I open a history book, I try to read between the lines. Yes, there is recorded history. I'm not concerned about that. I want to know the unrecorded. How did people actually live during those times? I recall a particular moment in a history classroom; we were studying 1920s american history. Our teacher told us to do a presentation where we had to use a specific set of slang terms from that era. While I can understand the core behind the project, it seemed so humiliatingly crude. Nobody from the 1920s talked the way our teacher expected us to talk. It is this sort of disconnect that makes people lose sight of humanity. I mean, who cares what happened a few years later? They were all a bunch of weirdos who used funny words.
Whereas how very different cultures view each other is testing, I particularly think it makes more sense to compare very similar cultures. For instance, I challenge Americans to open up a British history book. You won't find the "American Revolution" in there. You'll find the "American War of Independence". And because this sort of Weltanschauung divide is noticeable even among Anglophones, one can only truly appreciate the vast cultural gap when it comes to different languages and different countries! What I would like to know, however, is to what extent the nation or the language makes a difference. Would a French textbook from Francophone Canada be more similar to Anglophone Canada, or Francophone France?
But people don't want to ask these sorts of questions. It is much simpler to crudely reject all indications of cultural bias. Or even when such a cultural bias is acknowledged, can the extent really be esteemed?
I don't know whether to simply give up on my pursuit and admit that I won't be able to find a yâr, or to continue to hope that someday, somewhere, somehow there will be bright eyes staring right at me, perforating deep into my psyche.
But I doubt that will happen.
WEEGEE
"All the world's a stage,
And all the men and women merely players;
They have their exits and their entrances;
And one man in his time plays many parts,
His acts being seven ages. At first the infant,
Mewling and puking in the nurse's arms;
And then the whining school-boy, with his satchel
And shining morning face, creeping like snail
Unwillingly to school. And then the lover,
Sighing like furnace, with a woeful ballad
Made to his mistress' eyebrow. Then a soldier,
Full of strange oaths, and bearded like the pard,
Jealous in honour, sudden and quick in quarrel,
Seeking the bubble reputation
Even in the cannon's mouth. And then the justice,
In fair round belly with good capon lin'd,
With eyes severe and beard of formal cut,
Full of wise saws and modern instances;
And so he plays his part. The sixth age shifts
Into the lean and slipper'd pantaloon,
With spectacles on nose and pouch on side;
His youthful hose, well sav'd, a world too wide
For his shrunk shank; and his big manly voice,
Turning again toward childish treble, pipes
And whistles in his sound. Last scene of all,
That ends this strange eventful history,
Is second childishness and mere oblivion;
Sans teeth, sans eyes, sans taste, sans everything." — Jaques (Act II, Scene VII, lines 139-166)
What's particularly frightening is that it actually is possible for a person to be completely detached. I hate having to mold myself into archetypes. One of the most important things a person must do is accept the self. But it is always difficult when there is no actual predecessor of some sort to draw experience on. I suppose for some people, it is quite easy to be able to look at another person and empathize with just that person. There is, however, a difficulty when there is just too much empathy to go around. "Not fitting in" is in and of itself a form of fitting in. But it's a special kind. For starters, it is much more difficult to conciliate. I know this is fairly typical of people who feel like outcasts, but what's particularly frightening is what happens when even then it's not enough. Of course, every person's life is unique; but some are more unique than others. Downward spirals.
When I look back at what I have done, there is a very strange ambiance. I wish I was normal.
Normal.
But it's too late now. Will I find someone that will share my experiences? Is that even possible?
I've tried, but I don't find it likely. The idiosyncrasy is chilling. What I have noticed is that I can fit in, but it's always some sort of trade off. I can only tell some parts to some people. How that works is very much like a meat-grinder which has discrete settings which determine the size of the chunks.
I won't understand it; at least, not anytime soon. The specifics will fade away. Nothing will be left except for a dark aura of myth.
When I open a history book, I try to read between the lines. Yes, there is recorded history. I'm not concerned about that. I want to know the unrecorded. How did people actually live during those times? I recall a particular moment in a history classroom; we were studying 1920s american history. Our teacher told us to do a presentation where we had to use a specific set of slang terms from that era. While I can understand the core behind the project, it seemed so humiliatingly crude. Nobody from the 1920s talked the way our teacher expected us to talk. It is this sort of disconnect that makes people lose sight of humanity. I mean, who cares what happened a few years later? They were all a bunch of weirdos who used funny words.
Whereas how very different cultures view each other is testing, I particularly think it makes more sense to compare very similar cultures. For instance, I challenge Americans to open up a British history book. You won't find the "American Revolution" in there. You'll find the "American War of Independence". And because this sort of Weltanschauung divide is noticeable even among Anglophones, one can only truly appreciate the vast cultural gap when it comes to different languages and different countries! What I would like to know, however, is to what extent the nation or the language makes a difference. Would a French textbook from Francophone Canada be more similar to Anglophone Canada, or Francophone France?
But people don't want to ask these sorts of questions. It is much simpler to crudely reject all indications of cultural bias. Or even when such a cultural bias is acknowledged, can the extent really be esteemed?
I don't know whether to simply give up on my pursuit and admit that I won't be able to find a yâr, or to continue to hope that someday, somewhere, somehow there will be bright eyes staring right at me, perforating deep into my psyche.
But I doubt that will happen.
WEEGEE
Saturday, January 5, 2008
Did someone say election coverage?
after a long hiatus, I'm back. I just wanted to be yet another voice on the Internet. So how is the election going?
Iowa
It was interesting there. On the Democratic side, this showed just how much support the 2nd tier candidates have. Kucinich et al got pwned, receiving less votes than "uncommitted". But what's interesting is the top three. Obama got first place, with Edwards second, and Clinton a close third. However, Clinton ultimately received more delegates than Edwards, and only one less than Obama. So while some may say that Obama won, anyone serious can clearly see that the primary is still open for those three candidates. But as a result of the media blitz, Obama's chances have been artificially increased.
The results on the Republican side were also interesting. Huckabee won, with the next person Romney, a distant second. But it is third place that is interesting: McCain, Thompson, and Paul were all head to head. Whereas on the democrats, only those top three have a chance of winning the primary, the Republicans seem to say that it is still completely open to all candidates, except for Hunter. Giuliani received less votes than Paul, which surprised many people.
Wyoming
Little known Wyoming is interesting. as of right now, Romney is leading with the most delegates there (6), followed by Hunter and Thompson (1 each). 57% of precincts. But does a candidate really want to be identified with the other dude from Wyoming (Dick Cheney)?
New Hampshire is where it's at. Stay tuned.
Iowa
It was interesting there. On the Democratic side, this showed just how much support the 2nd tier candidates have. Kucinich et al got pwned, receiving less votes than "uncommitted". But what's interesting is the top three. Obama got first place, with Edwards second, and Clinton a close third. However, Clinton ultimately received more delegates than Edwards, and only one less than Obama. So while some may say that Obama won, anyone serious can clearly see that the primary is still open for those three candidates. But as a result of the media blitz, Obama's chances have been artificially increased.
The results on the Republican side were also interesting. Huckabee won, with the next person Romney, a distant second. But it is third place that is interesting: McCain, Thompson, and Paul were all head to head. Whereas on the democrats, only those top three have a chance of winning the primary, the Republicans seem to say that it is still completely open to all candidates, except for Hunter. Giuliani received less votes than Paul, which surprised many people.
Wyoming
Little known Wyoming is interesting. as of right now, Romney is leading with the most delegates there (6), followed by Hunter and Thompson (1 each). 57% of precincts. But does a candidate really want to be identified with the other dude from Wyoming (Dick Cheney)?
New Hampshire is where it's at. Stay tuned.
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